A Guide to Romance

The Art Of The Ask


Asking someone out on a date can be both thrilling and nerve-wracking. It's the moment where you step out of your comfort zone and take a chance on romance. But how do you ensure that your proposition of a date is well received and, more importantly, results in an enthusiastic 'yes'?

Confidence is key

Firstly, confidence plays a massive role in asking someone out. This does not mean you have to be loud or overtly assertive. Instead, it's about a quiet confidence: being sure of yourself and respecting both your own feelings and the person you'd like to ask out. Remember, confidence is attractive, and showing that you are genuinely interested in getting to know someone is a good start.

Personalise your approach

The 'one-size-fits-all' approach rarely works when it comes to dating. Tailor your invitation to the person's interests. If they love books, suggest a trip to a local bookshop followed by coffee to discuss your finds. If they're foodies, perhaps a reservation at a new restaurant would be appealing. Showing that you've paid attention to their interests goes a long way in making the moment memorable.

Be direct, yet flexible

While it's important to be clear about your intentions, flexibility is key. Be direct with your ask by using clear language such as, "Would you like to go out for dinner with me this Friday?" but also be prepared for them to suggest an alternative. They might be interested but have prior commitments, so being open to negotiation can demonstrate maturity and consideration for their schedule.

Consider the timing

Timing can be everything. Choosing the right moment to ask someone out is crucial—a hurried conversation between meetings or when the person is clearly busy might not yield the answer you're hoping for. Instead, find a time when both of you are relaxed and can engage in a brief conversation.

Use a little humour

A touch of humour can ease the pressure and make the situation feel less daunting for both parties. This doesn't mean you should perform a stand-up routine, but a light-hearted comment or a playful suggestion can show your personality and make the invitation more appealing. Keep it tasteful and make sure it's in line with the other person's sense of humour.

Respect their response

Finally, no matter what response you receive, respect it. If they say yes, fantastic! If they’re not interested, thank them for their honesty and handle it with grace. Rejection is never easy, but it's a part of life. Maintaining dignity and respect in the face of a 'no' can leave both of you with a positive impression of the exchange.